I almost didn't write this post this morning, for fear I might win some award for Internet's Most Depressing Blog. But since you've all been on this journey with me, I can't help but share it with all of you.
Saturday night, we lost all our chickens, but two, to a fox. The fox took a guinea the night before, and so Saturday night Dan and I got out to lock in the hens in what we thought was plenty of time. It was dusk. When I stepped out onto the porch I could hear the commotion. I ran back inside to get my big, heavy Mag flashlight, (What I was going to do with it, I have no idea. I'm not that brave.) And called up to Dan, who was snuggling the girls, in my most "calm, but I need you right away" voice.
He jumped into boots and tore off across the yard. I jumped in the car and raced into the second driveway so I could shine my headlights on the coop. We were too late.
We scared the fox off, but she'd left a battle field in the grass around the coop. It was devastating.
I honestly can't get over this one so easily. I try not to think that this is all my fault. That there they were, nestled in their coop, just waiting for me to lock them in safely for the night. That if I hadn't done this or that, dilly-dallying before I went out to lock them in, I would have gotten there in time. I feel like I'm failing as a "farmer", with all this loss we've been experiencing lately.
I try not to think that these are the hens that my grandmother gave to my girls.
Dan comforts me saying that if it wasn't Saturday night, it would have been Sunday, or Monday, or....that this kind of thing happens to all farmers. That it's not a reflection of what kind of caretaker I am. But still. It's hard. And sad. I loved those stupid chickens.
I don't know where I'll go from here. I don't think I'm up for another round of chicks in my downstairs bathroom right now. Dan wants to buy some grown hens from my uncle, to keep our last two girls company. One of our hens hasn't even come out of the coop since this all happened. I feel like I want things to settle down before we bring more chickens into our apparent "take out diner" for foxes.
We'll see. I'm sure more hens will be here someday soon.
Meanwhile, if you want to ignore the above post and move on, I busied my mind over the weekend with some blog remodeling--a new banner, new sidebar stuff, and I brought back the short list of good things. So, if you feel like moving on, why not click over and let me know what you think of the new look.
And I promise, less depressing posts the rest of the week.
As always, thanks for listening and following along on this journey.
{photo coutesy of katie pertiet}
